My Singing Journey, and Musings from Nigerian Idol & The Voice Nigeria
Self-awareness gaps leave us open to accidents, mistaken ambitions, and poorly formulated life choices, as evidenced by the experiences of some of the contestants at the auditions.
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In my past life, I was a singer 😊.
Not only did I grow up in the choir, but I was also a member of different singing groups, including two boy bands. I loved listening to music and singing along. In fact, in my early teenage years, I remember always having my ears plugged as I did the dishes and other house chores, listening and singing melodiously *coughs* to songs from Whitney Houston, Céline Dion, Mariah Carey, Michael Jackson, CeCe Winans, Boys II Men, Westlife, and R. Kelly, amongst others. Those were fun times. If truth be told, my dream then was to be a musician, and with my vivid imagination, I would often picture myself singing to a large crowd of people. Anyways, life happened, lol, and here I am with a new lease of life. But I still love music.
Today, I find pleasure in attending concerts as well as watching live performances and singing talent shows. So, you can imagine my delight when The Voice Nigeria and Nigerian Idol went live a few weeks back. As expected, I have diligently followed the weekend live episodes 😊.
Now, during the auditions, I watched many contestants come on the show with some conviction that they could sing and would be leaving with a yes from the judges. Some of the very confident contestants particularly were confounding. They had appeared eager towards the audition, there had been a certain sparkle to their eyes, an erectness to their carriage, and the talent show seemed like an interesting adventure to them.
Alas! They started singing, and I could not but wonder what ever gave them the faintest notion that they could sing and should come audition at the talent show. I initially considered that they probably just came to try their luck and have fun, but had to discard following the shock and utter disbelief expressions they wore on their faces as they got the negative commentaries from the judges. Apparently, they had had no shadow of doubt that they would get a yes from the judges. I, on the other hand, could not fathom how they thought they could get a yes. Whatever gave them the inkling that they could sing? Whoever lied to them? And why would they lie to them, since some had said that their friends had encouraged them? Even worse, a few had quit their jobs to audition, in pursuit of a dream that they evidently did not yet have the requisite skills for at the time.
Watching the auditions really got me thinking, considering the world of today where we urge people to live their dreams. I mean, these guys had a dream, they were pursuing that dream up to quitting their jobs or leaving school to come audition, and they were fully convinced that they had what it took to make their dreams come true. So, what went wrong there? How could they have missed it?
The more I pondered, the more I had questions. Could one perhaps be pursuing a dream that they are not qualified or do not yet have the requisite skillset for? How do you know if you have what it takes to live your dreams or otherwise? What if you are being delusional and just pursuing a fantasy? How do you really know?
So, Dear Reader, as we go into June, here are two critical points I would like you to consider on your journey to living your dreams:
Do you have people in your corner who tell you the truth with radical candour and hold you accountable?
You can fool yourself, you know. You’d think it’s impossible, but it turns out it’s the easiest thing of all. ― Jodi Picoult
The truth is that we are all blind to certain dimensions of who we really are. Unconsciously, we distort what we think others are perceiving about us and assume they see us the same way we see (or want to see) ourselves. This gap in our level of self-awareness leaves us open to accidents, mistaken ambitions, and poorly formulated life choices, as evidenced by the experiences of these contestants at the audition.
Hence, we all need people in our corners who can be our mirrors, who can tell us the truth, and who can hold us accountable. Not people-pleasing, too polite, and “yes” persons or people whose good intentions lead them to keep their less pleasant observations to themselves, but people who will not sugar-coat the truth we need to hear whilst having our backs and pushing us to succeed. People who know our goals and dreams and can tell us with radical candour if we are on track or messing up. People who can tell us the gaps we still need to address on our journey to living our dreams.
Perhaps if the contestants had had such people in their lives, they would not have proceeded to audition, at least not this year’s singing talent show. Just perhaps.
So, Dear Reader, do you have such people in your corner? If not, find someone. Someone who has your best interest at heart and can tell you the truth kindly and gently. For until you address your blind spot, you will continue to limit your ability to influence others and succeed at the level you desire.
What systems have you put in place for the achievement of your goals and dreams?
Everyone has goals. Systems are the single differentiating factor between winners and losers. – James Clear
Dreams and goals need systems to work. While goals and dreams are about the results to be achieved, systems are about the processes that lead to those results. If you want to be a singer, how much hours are you putting in to understand your voice, improve your vocal dexterity, and rehearse? If your goal is to gain or lose weight, how much sacrifice, discipline, resilience, and consistency are you putting into your workout routines?
Rehearsing once is common, rehearsing daily is rare. Exercising today is simple. Training every week is simply remarkable. Writing one essay does not mean much. Writing every day practically makes you a hero. Studying today is nothing new. Studying weekly is everything. 1
So, Dear Reader, do you currently have systems for your dreams and goals? More importantly, how consistent are you with those systems? If you haven’t got systems for your dreams and goals yet, why not focus on that this June? (Reading Atomic Habits by James Clear may come in handy).
Perhaps if those contestants had designed the right systems for a singing career and maintained discipline and consistency, they would have been thought naturally talented and given a yes by the judges. Just perhaps. For boring progress makes for exceptional results.
In concluding, it becomes necessary to recognize that, indeed, there were contestants at the auditions who could really sing yet did not get a yes from the judges. But I think James Clear aptly put it when he tweeted:
Love and Light,
O’Seye
P.S. Would I return to music sometime? Who knows? Never say never 😊
Culled from James Clear